Disclaimer: I think I already mentioned this in my previous entries in case I haven’t… Let me just clarify. I am not expert ony guys and relationship and I am not even expert on my job so I am not saying that everything written here is scientifically-proven. These are just figments of my mind’s never ending battle to think and analyze the words I hear, the notes I see, and the stories that were relayed to me. I am hoping that this post help those who are experiencing this kind of situation. 🙂
You see I have been hearing and reading about guys who are always STUCK in the FRIEND ZONE. For those of you who aren’t aware of what the FRIEND ZONE means…..
It is some kind of a untangible friendship boundary of some sort that some guys really wanted to cross but they cannot. It happens when a guy likes a girl that he is good friends with and he get stuck up with this friendship wall that he cannot even tell her how he feels and the girl doesn’t even have a clue that he likes her. To her, he is just a good friend that is always there for her and any idea of romance does not even cross her mind. She just never really thinks of him in a romantic way and the guy pretends that he doesn’t think of her in that way as well, but he is only fooling himself. He just stays friends with her though he wanted to be more than that, hence, the friend zone.
In short, the guys in the friend zone are always the “GOOD GUY FRIENDS” but never the ones that the girls fall for.
Here are the reasons that I can think of why guys in the FRIEND ZONE remains in the FRIEND ZONE:
1. You are still in the friend zone because…
YOU ARE TOO AFRAID TO TAKE CHANCES!
Yes. You are too scared that you won’t get the response that you are expecting so you’d rather stay back and watch other guys make their way to her heart. You are always afraid that saying what you really feel because it may ruin your friendship. Hello! Yes, if she doesn’t feel the same way then it might cause a little awkwardness but if you guys are really friends then you guys will find a way back to being better friends. You just have to accept the fact that she just thinks of you as a friend and nothing more. And eventually let your feelings go and then strengthen the friendship even more. But if she likes you back then BINGO!
2. You are still in the FRIEND ZONE because…
YOU TREAT HER LIKE SHE’S ONE OF YOUR GUY FRIENDS.
Just because you want to look cool and you don’t wanther to figure out that you like her, you try your best to treat her like she is one of your bros. Calling her dude, bro, homey, and what not. Telling her about this imaginary girl that you’ve been crushing on. Teaching her the fist pump or secret handshake and all other guys stuff that you do with your boys.
Guess what??? You sure succeeded in hiding your feelings but you also succeeded in helping her cross you out in her romantic meter. Good Job!
3. You are still in the friend zone because…
YOU ALWAYS MAKE YOURSELF AVAILABLE FOR HER!
One call and you’ll immediately drop everything that you are doing just to attend to whatever it is that she needs. She needs someone to help her move the furnitures in her house, you’ll be there. She needs someone to look after her dog, you’ll take care of her dog. She’s having trouble with her project, you’ll volunteer to help her out… Normally, that is a good thing…. IF YOU GUYS ARE ALREADY TOGETHER. But since you guys are not together yet, you should try be a good friend sometimes learn to say no or learn how to say yes without sounding too enthusiatic about it. 🙂 In that way, you seem a little mysterious and a little unpredictable and you’ll raise her interest. REMEMBER THE GOAL IS TO MAKE YOU “HER GUY” first then be her “GO-TO GUY”. Not the other way around. 🙂
4. You are still in the friend zone because…
YOU EVEN TRY TO SET HER UP WITH ANOTHER GUY THOUGH YOUR INSTINCTS ARE TELLING YOU NOT TO.
Being a good friend that you always are, you even try setting her up with your freind that she likes or with a friend of yours who likes her. That is just totally BAT SHIT CRAZY, MEN! That’s a very uncomfortable thing to do so never everdo that! And if you already did then please do not repeat it. Again, Learn how to say no! If you can’t take the sight of her in some other guy’s arms then do not ever try to make that possible!
***There you go! I hope that helps.
In summary, to get yourself out of the FRIEND ZONE!
1. Be a MAN!
2. Summon up all the courage in the world and tell her how you feel. If she says yes then good. If she says no, then even better because now you know that you being in the friend zone is not your fault, that means she just really wants you to there and then just be friend. You will soon find someone who is willing to be your friend and much more willing to be your lover. 🙂
3. If you confess and it didn’t work out, Don’t lose hope. 🙂
It is 5:30 am here and I can’t sleep. What better way to spend my free time than writing? I was supposed to write an entry about the list of the places I want to visit but then I suddenly think of the reason why I am writing in the first place.
I think most people write for a whole lot of reasons.
I remember the first job interview that I had 3 years ago, the interviewer asked me about the thing that I like to do so I said “I love to write essays, poems, songs, and the likes.” I thought my answer would suffice but there was a follow-up… “Why do you love to write?” she asked.
And then I blurted out the MOST EMO answer that one could possibly say in a job interview… I said “Sometimes I write to remember and sometimes I write to forget.” Say what? 🙂 lol.
Did I mention that this was a group interview so a couple of my friends with a couple of other stranger was there? Yes, I think my friends couldn’t help but smile after hearing that. But its true.
There are many things that I love about writing and resaons why I keep on writing. 🙂
I write to remember the things that are really important or special. I think my mind retains it well when I wrote things down.
I also write to forget the horrible things and just get it out my mind.
I write because its my way of expressing the feelings and words that I am unable to speeak or utter.
I write because it myself feel better after a long difficult day.
I write to share my stories and passion about family, friends, love and life itself.
I write to be able to reach other people and somehow touch their lives.
I write not because I think I am good in writing but I want to be better at it.
I write because I love how it feels when I am done and I read my work and somehow I know that those words are real.
Writing makes me feel alive and it makes me feel positive about life. It is a great feeling when someone reads your works and they tell you how they liked it and they encouraged you to be better. It is amazing how a stranger read your works and then tell how they feel about it and somehow they were able to see from your point of view . I know I have a lot to learn about writing and I know I may not write best words yet but I will still write anyway because I know someday I can be really good at it.
Thanks to the people who are continuously encouraging me to write and are reading my works. Thank you for all the kind words and please do know also love reading your works and most of the time they inspire me to be better and make me remember the things that I often forget. Hope to hear from ya! 🙂
A frustrated traveler. I think that’s what I can call myself. As a child, I have always dreamed of going around the world. I used to love reading about different counrties and cities and somehow I feel that I am travelling vicariously every time I read. I think I was about 10 when I memorized almost every single country and it’s capital. I was quite dreamer and I still am now.
There are a lot places that I want to go to but it was never the right time or I never had enough money. But It were up to me, I’d be definitely out there, travelling the world, learning languages, taking pictures and eating every native delicacies.
Now, It still isn’t the right time and I still don’t have the money to get me somewhere I want to be but I will not stop dreaming. Maybe someday, I’ll be able to go around the places that I want to be. I don’t really know how can I be able to do that, maybe I’ll win the lottery or maybe when I have someone else’s pay check or whatever but I know Icant give up on my dreams.
I can’t wait for the day that I’m sitting in the shore of a beach somewhere writing about how marvelous and surreal just looking and drowning of it’s natural beaty or the time when I am in a knee-deep snow and feeling so cold but still making my very first snowman. Or the time when I am in the middle of park where leaves are falling endlessly as wind is blowing them all around. Or the time I’m in a wonderful garden where every flowers bloom around me. I just cant wait to witness every unique majestic view of the different places I want to visit. I can’t wait to see first hand how enchant how every places speak of stories of people and structures and I can’t wait to write all about it.
Someday, hopefully I can. 🙂
I’ll be writing down the list of the places that I wan’t to visit on my next blog.
Not just half-awake but wide awake. I have always thought of writing a novel. And for few occasions, I started writing, but halfway through the intro, I always feel that I am not ready. I have no formal training in writng and I always end up doubting myself and thinking that It will be a waste of time. Now I realized that doubting myself is an awful way of wasting time. I should have continued writing those unfinished works. I would have had, give or take two sucky unpublished novels by now but nonetheless I could have used all the experience that I could have gain in order to improve my craft and write something better but I was so scared to fail and be bad at it that I chose not to continue writing.
But I know now that Writing is way too important to give up just like that.
It is time for me to write my first novel and I know it will not be easy.
And maybe I will fail to do so, but what is life without taking risk?
I will write because it makes me feel good and it is something that I want to be good at.And when are passionate about something, you just need not question your abilities and just do it. And if in time, I will fail to finish this novel, It is comforting to know that I tried.
But I am kinda hoping that I will finish it. So I better start writing now. 🙂
I’m sorry I haven’t posted something for almost a week. I’ve been kind of busy with work.
My shift at work changed so I was quite adjusting to it. And I’ve been thinking of new ways to improve this site.
You know, I’m thinking of new materials and topics to write about.
And also, since my job is keeping me occupied on most days, I think for quite sometime, my frequency of blogging will be weekly. I’ll try to write as much as I can during my days off. 🙂
I think these are the things that guys shoould know about, if they want to get on a girl’s good side and maybe this will also help guys understand girls more.
1. Girls are sentimental.
That’s a random fact. A girl always likes to remember important things in her life. She also likes to cherish the moments that made her happy and the simple gifts or letters that she received. Like taking her out to see the stars, I’m sure she’ll have that image of you two under the night skies tattoed in her head. Or giving her a handwritten letter, I’m sure she’ll keep that in box and reads it when she misses you. Just give her something that she would love to remember and cherish then I’m sure she’ll be hooked.
2. Girls like hearing compliments.
I mean, who doesn’t? But you know, Girls, no matter, how strong and confident they may seem. They still would want other people to notice and compliment them. It’s not like their waiting on other people’s approval but it is theirway of knowing that they are appreciated. SO If you like a girl, make sure sure you compliment her in all the right ways. Never overcompliment her because she may think that you are insincere. Never undercompliment her because she may think you don’t know her worth. In other words, don’t say anything that you don’t really mean.
3. GIRLS like a guy who treats her well.
I know, most guys think that girls are into bad boys and the good guys are always left in the friends zone. But this isn’t true. Sure, AT one point in Every girl’s life, she may spend her time and energy chasing a bad boy and hoping that she’d be the one to change him. But sooner or later, when she is exhausted and aware that sometimes bad boys are just merely bad boys and there isn’t anything mysterious about it and she can never change him for the better because that’s just how he is, She will snap back to reality and she’ll remember that she deserves a guy who’s willing to do right by her and someone she can definitely rely on. So that’s your cue guys, Bad boys are just short experiments. Good guys are life-long journeys! So try your best to be a good guy. 🙂
4. Girls like a guy who can make her laugh.
Girls would definitely like a guy with a good sense of humor. Someone who can make her laugh. Someone whom she can be silly with. Someone whom she can be herself with. It doesn’t matter if you have bad comic timing or you always throw the punch line wrong a girl know how to appreciate the efforts you give in order to make her laugh.
5. GIRLS who say NO really means No.
Yes. I know most guys think girls like to play hard-to-get and sometimes they really do play hard-to-get. But trust me, you know the difference. If you like a girl says no to you yet still gives you signals then she is playing hard to get, all you have to do is just reachout to her more and be patient with her then you can definitely win her over. But if a girl says no to you and she’s making an effort for you to notice the boundaries and she keeps on turning you down, then she is not pplaying hard-to-get, she simply saying not-gonna-happen. It sucks, I know. But maybe she is just not the girl for you.
I have no scientific proof with regards to this.
This are just my humble thoughts.
If you have anything to add or you have complaints, Please
say it in a nice way. 🙂 Thanks